Thursday, June 26, 2008
you know what. i was just watching onetreehill. thinking about stuff. that episode i was watching. yeah. season 5 episode 10. it was brooke going back. finding rachel near death due to drug overuse. why? cause she had given up on herself. and she thought that brooke had left her alone. which brings me to this.
let me tell you all a story. there is a sportswoman. one who was so successful ever since she was what. 11? she could beat a few of the top bowlers who were in secondary school. slowly she progressed. making it to represent singapore. all her friends love her to bits. she's lucky enough to have everything anyone wants. especially. the x-factor. whatever that means. and yeah. she had this special friend. one who got close to her unexpectedly. and one who was always there for her. recently, they've been drifting. the talented bowler, gives up on her faith in anything. she loses the confidence that she once had. locking her blog in the past is a great proof of lack of confidence. now. everyone is locked out. so you can basically see a great change. her friend, can only watch and hope that the person she really loves and cares for can pull herself back together and find the confidence to confide in her once again.
to you know who you are. you know i really wanna help you. everyone does. i know you may say you can make it on your own. even so. your friends need you. and they need you to need them. _ is worrying about you EVERY SINGLE DAY. even sometimes when she tries to take you out of her mind. she cant. she tries telling herself you dont matter. but every single bowler who knows about the friendship between you two. would know. that is not gonna happen. she cant not care about you. in fact. its not only her. i think all of us wanna help you. but we need you to let us in. i feel really bad. for that incident on the 19th of june. i dont know if thats the reason why you're avoiding her as well. i hope not. previously when you two have this kinda thingg. i'll like drop you a message. and strangely you all are like better and all. or at least you start talking more. but now. i doubt it works anymore because i tried. and i feel really bad for not being able to help her. and whats worse is that i have a feeling its cause of that day that you two drifted.
i hope that you find it in you to pull yourself back. for everyone. and for yourself. your personal message was once "people always leave". taken from onetreehill. i dont know if you meant it. but now im taking this incident from the same show to plead with you. even if you give up on yourself. you think everyone has left you. if rachel can pull herself up and let brooke in once more. why cant you. no one is leaving. we're all here for you. know that.
i just hope YOU are reading this.
And when it rains,
Will you always find an escape?
Just running away,
From all of the ones who love you,
From everything.
You made yourself a bed
At the bottom of the blackest hole (blackest hole)
And you'll sleep 'til May
And you'll say that you don't want to see the sun anymore
rants you never saw @ 8:37 PM